Beauty is the Eye of the Beholder

I'm not sure if the Universe wanted me to be having this experiment at this exact time, but it seems like there are so many things I'm noticing related to beauty and what we as women tell ourselves about beauty.  Yesterday on a national morning news program, the co-host commented that she was afraid to get married because she didn't want to fail.  She and the other co-host were joking about why she hadn't 'tied the knot' yet.  She said she didn't want to fail and that she was afraid that if she got married and (gesturing with her hand around her face) if this all went away, she'd surely scare her new husband away.  She was making an all too familiar joke with women regarding how they look without their makeup. My ears instantly perked up at what she was saying and how the men co-host was reacting.  He laughed right along with her in her joke.  Why do we instantly think that without our makeup, men would go 'running for the hills'??  Whatever happened to a great personality, intelligence and sense of humor being tops on the list????  Why, on national television, is a woman stating that the reason she is afraid to get married is because she doesn't want the future husband to see her without all her makeup???? It is so sad to see that even in this form of media, we are getting the message that to be beautiful, a women must be dressed a certain way, look a certain way and above all, wear makeup.  This mindset is deeply ingrained in so many women across so many demographics...what can we do, as women, to stop the cycle????

A co-worker and I were looking at a very cute and stylish dress and she had nothing but negative things to say about her body and how she perceived it would look in the dress.  She said her hips were too wide, her chest too flat....and finally I looked at her and said,..."now that you've been so negative about yourself this morning, how about you tell me FIVE positive things about your body that you love."   Needless to say, she had a difficult time getting to five things.  My heart broke because I know, personally, it is so much easier to focus on the things we hate about ourselves rather the things we find beautiful.  When did we go from being 'beautiful princesses' at age 5 to negative self hating women at 25???  We need to change that little voice in our head and start looking for the beauty once again.  We need to see that we are princesses and we are beautiful just the way we were created.

My reactions to going sans makeup have still been minimal at best.  Not a single blink or double take.  I'm beginning to feel more and more comfortable in my own natural skin.  I'm no longer looking for the reactions, I'm challenging myself to become more attune to the women around me and what they need to hear. As women, we need to be uplifting to each other and take notice of too much negative self talk.  We need to be each others cheerleaders!! My challenge to whomever is reading and keeping up with this blog, find 5 things daily about yourself that you love.  Say these five things aloud, write them down and post them on your various mirrors and maybe, just maybe we can begin listening to the positive rather than the negative.

Remember, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so maybe we starting seeing OURSELVES as beautiful.

Days 1-2 of the Regression Challenge

Beauty is a characteristic of a person, animal, place, object or idea that provides a perceptual experience of pleasure or satisfaction.  This, as defined by Wikipedia, is an interesting definition of beauty that goes hand in hand with my regression challenge.  This definition got me to thinking...since beauty is solely a perceptual experience, can we change our perceptions??  When are we too old to changes perceptions we may have had for many years??  One of my goals in this experiment is to perhaps change or modify the perception in others and/or myself.  What if we were able to re-define beauty as we all know it???  How much of an impact could this change make?  

So far in my quest, I've not had any questions regarding my appearance minus the makeup.  I worked yesterday in my salon and had one client that I could tell she noticed something was different, but didn't say anything.  Today I worked at my other job and neither the co-workers or customers seemed to take notice.  I, however, have noticed slight changes within myself.  I noticed yesterday that I wasn't checking on a regular basis to make sure my blemishes were concealed, because I knew they weren't. I haven't noticed any grand personality changes as of yet, but I can say that I feel more honest.  I'm a very straightforward person with those that I know and not having any makeup made it a challenge to interact with strangers.  Maybe I'm thinking too much into this, but I do know it was difficult to make eye contact with people yesterday and today it seems to be getting easier.  Perhaps my true confidence is building....  

I am excited to see how each day progresses and how I change and grow in this experience.  I am hoping to impact others lives as well.  I want women and men, but particularly women, to really think deeply about what they find beautiful within them....challenge themselves to see the beauty beneath the makeup.

New Year...New you??

Happy New Year!!  With those three little words we automatically feel the need to improve our lives, health, jobs and relationships.  What if we regress rather than move forward???  I've heard it said that change for the sake of change is not always a good thing.  What if progression for the sake of progressing were the same way??? This thought got me to wondering...what if I make a resolution to regress rather than progress???  How would this be perceived??  How would I be perceived?  What would my friends and family think?  How would this affect my clients in my salon??  Would anyone even notice???

Being in the beauty industry, image is everything....truly. As a salon owner and stylist, my job is to make others look as beautiful on the outside as they are on the inside.  I love what I do and the instant gratification that comes along with it...but, I've begun to notice how wrapped up we as a society are becoming over our looks and all that comes with that.  I began to notice how many people are so worried about "looking the part".  I see so many naturally beautiful people who have little to zero self confidence and I wondered if it all went hand in hand with our need to "look beautiful".  Have we forgotten the real meaning of beauty??  Do we know what it means to be beautiful??  How confident would we be if we stripped down all the things that made us beautiful and just lived our lives and truly sought out the real beauty in life..???    

So....I've decided to begin this stripping down process.  For the next 90 days I will be stripping down and regressing in areas of my life that may or may not be related to my physical appearance.  First thing to go is my makeup.  To some this may sound like no big deal, but to me, its huge.  I've worn makeup ever since I was 17 years old...I'm 35 now, so that is a long time. In this process of stripping down things, my goal is to blog the responses, if any, that I receive.  I thought long and hard about why I wear makeup and what it is that I feel as if I gain.  I have come to many different conclusions.  One, makeup makes me feel as if I can camouflage my physical flaws, whether real or perceived.  I feel as though I am able to face the world with a renewed confidence when I am in my makeup.  Am I truly this confident with my makeup or is it simply a perceived confidence??  I want to get to the bottom of this very question in this regressing project.  We see so many confident men out in the world...and they generally do not wear makeup, so what gives??  Are women the weaker sex and lacking in natural confidence that we feel the need to build ourselves up in whatever way possible with makeup and 'beauty' products??  Do women lack the self esteem to just be real and completely natural as most men??  Is the 'double standard' that we all gripe about something that we as women created or is it what men prefer???  

Stay tuned to this blog for more stripping and regressing and the reactions that may or may not happen.  I'm hoping for an enlightened perspective on what true beauty really is.  I hope that in this project, I am able to re-define beauty as we know it, or at least in my own eyes.  

Baby Steps

Today I went to visit my mom and step dad in St. Louis.  My step dad is still recovering from brain trauma and has now been moved to a rehab hospital.  My mom hasn't left his side since the accident on Nov 11.  It is amazing to see the progress he has made from then until today.  He is going to both physical and occupational therapy to re-learn the simplest things.  Today I was in the room while his speech therapist was working with him.  He can't speak yet, he still has a trach in, but he can comprehend and nod/point to his answers.  He even 'wrote' a little with his right hand.  It was so surreal to watch him barely answer questions that were so simple, but to his mind, so difficult. 

Life happens so quick.  Here is a man who is extraordinarily talented musically...can play guitar, banjo, mandolin, dulcimer...struggling to answer questions like 'is it 2010?'  I can see in his eyes he knows but doesn't understand why.  Mom told me today that he wrote in his physical therapy on a piece of paper two words.  "Why"  and "Can't"...she broke down at that...and reassured him that in time he will be able to do all the things he used to be able to do.  He is so courageous and strong.  He keeps fighting and he is such an amazing example of perseverance.  I am so proud to be his daughter and to know that each day he gets stronger and stronger.  My mom is a strong woman who hasn't left and most likely won't leave him for a minute.  She knows that he has it in him to fight through this and she won't miss one minute of his recovery.  He gave her a thumbs up after his therapy this afternoon.  He knows he has to celebrate the baby steps...right now, they are the only steps we have.

Salon Atmosphere

Today was my first day in the salon.  I love it!!  I didn't do any actual hair work, but I did get a chance to get involved with the other staff, learn some product info and get a feel of how the salon works and operates.  I can't wait to do this on a regular basis!!!  I am so fortunate to have a job immediately after school! 

The salon I am working is a great place!  The atmosphere is one of learning, growing and most importantly FUN!!  I am thrilled about being part of this team and growing with them and the salon!! 

I received my itinerary for my upcoming New York trip for Matrix.  I am so thrilled at this opportunity still...I haven't stopped smiling!  I'm finding myself not being too nervous for this part of the experience.  The thought of traveling for six months and learning and sharing all I've experienced still amazes me and makes me so eager to get my feet in the water!!  I feel that this new career path of mine is something I was meant to do and I'm simply thrilled to get it going and explore all the new exciting things that lie ahead of me!!

Mark my words....I will become a household name!!

I AM SO THANKFUL!!

There are so many things going on ina my life for me to be thankful for.  I have an amazing family who loves and supports me in all my endeavors.  I have wonderful friends whom I love dearly.  I am a graduate of cosmetology school.   I have a new career that I am excited about!!  I am a FINALIST in Matrix Spread the Love competition!!  And the list goes on...

The next few months in my life are going to be a whirwind of activity and new experiences.  I will be traveling to New York City for the final interview for the Matrix Spread the Love.  I know this 6 month opportunity was made for me!  When I think about it and being involved with it, I never think of NOT being chosen to be one of the six.  I can't imagine not experiencing everything this opportunity has to offer!!  I'm so thankful to be this far into it!!   This is my dream and I am so fortunate to be given the opportunity to potentially live my dream!!  I'm excited for the next few weeks/months!

I know that everything happens for a reason.  I know that I moved back to Missouri at just the right time to start cosmetology school when I did so that I would be eligible for this opportunity, so that I would meet the amazing people I have, and so that I would gain the confidence and know-how to be a  successful cosmetologist.
I am so thankful and grateful beyond measure!  I know that ..'all things work together for good to them who love the Lord..'  I am believing that this isn't the final step for me!!

Three days till Graduation...so, the end in sight!

My graduation is nearing ever so close...three days to be exact.  This moment is surreal actually...I'm a bundle of emotions.  I'm super excited to be finished, somewhat sad to leave my dear friends, and nervous about actually starting my new career.  The last year has been quite a journey....

This time last year, I had just moved 1200 miles across the country from Leesburg Virginia back to my hometown of Potosi Missouri.  I was living in Virginia working as a manager for a grocery store...overworked and overstressed.  I was ready for change...I was just going through the motions in my life and wanting something new, something I could be passionate about.  I kept going back to something I had always dreamt about doing and loved...cosmetology.  After toiling over it for weeks/months, I finally decided to make the change.  I knew a change this drastic would require some relocating on my part.  A move this big meant some big time family support. 

So, here we are...a year later, new state, new city and now...new career.  I'm so glad that I finally made the change to pursue my true passion for art and cosmetology.  I've never been this happy in my career...EVER!  I'm so thankful for my family who have been amazing during this year of transition.  If I hadn't had them, I don't think I could have ever made this change.  I think of how things would be if I hadn't moved...I'd be miserable in Virginia. 

I'm so excited to see what the next chapter in my life holds.  I'm thrilled about making it in the semi finals of the Spread the Love and I'm anxiously awaiting to hear whether I move on or not.  I am thrilled at my career that lies ahead of me and can't wait to start in the salon!!  The sky's the limit on where I can go in this industry!!  Now...its full speed ahead!!